Psycho 101

Is there a class you can take on how to deal with someone who is.....okay - maybe not psycho - but definitely manipulative, conniving, and self-destructive? Please - SIGN ME UP!

Can I just say that this was pretty much the weekend from hell?

It started out really well if you count the beginning at Thursday. That's the day Shaine came over to watch movies and hang out with me and the boys. While the original message also contained an invitation to...mmmm...be naughty, soccer practice was cancelled and therefore so was the privacy to carry out that portion of the invite. So all we did was sit on the couch and watch The Dictator.

He rubbed my thigh - slow, lazy circles with just a fingertip - the kind you feel all the more because you barely feel it. He played with my hand the same way, teasing and tickling and barely holding it. After that movie was over we moved into my bedroom to watch American Reunion (because Daemon wanted to sleep on the couch.) Even laying on my bed, with the privacy of the door shut, all he did was lay on my lap and squeeze my thigh occasionally. Not that I didn't move him into my room with ulterior motives....but he didn't seem to get the hint!

Pretty soon it was 10 minutes after eleven and he had to leave to go to work. I decided at that point that I'd had enough of the nice girl routine and planted a big, wet kiss on him. A long, slow, sexy wet kiss (that...uuhhumm....obviously aroused him. *wink wink*) Then he kissed me. Then I kissed him. Then we both groaned and retreated to our separate corners. hehehehehe.

After he left for work, he continued to text me for a time. We decided that he would come over in the morning after the kids had left for school and there was privacy to do more than kiss before it was my turn to leave for work. That, however, did not work out. He ended up calling me the next morning and cancelling because he "was stinky and sweaty from work." Grrr!!!

So right there Friday was starting out as a huge disappointment. Then Brenden left to a friend's house and I got stuck at home all night with Daemon and Alex and nothing to do. Until almost 3 a.m. when BOTH Shaine and Gene texted me. At that point, I was sorta seething inside. I am/was sick and tired of Gene always and ONLY calling me when he is drunk and wants in my bed. He doesn't ask me to go to the bar with him - nope. He just wants somewhere to go when he strikes out on asking other women at the bar. So - yes - I was in a VERY pissy mood about the whole thing. So I told Gene not to come over. Shaine decided he was too drunk to drive that far - so I went to bed alone and pissed off at them both.

Saturday I sent a text to Shaine telling him that I was mildly annoyed that he had "stood me up" twice in a row and he needed to make it up to me. :) So we made plans to hang out later that night - after I dropped the kids off at the babysitter's house. We ended up going to Your Bar (yeah, I know...funny name for a bar, right?) and playing pool while having a few drinks. My mom and Scott showed up unexpectedly so I even had someone to dance with. I was having a GREAT time.

Until Gene.

After he got out of work he texted me and asked what I was doing, so I told him I was out with Shaine. To say he blew a gasket and completely lost his mind would be putting it mildly. Geesh! Constant text messages from him saying really stupid and mean things. He wanted to know what bar I was at, was I going to go to bed with him, was I this, was I that...on and on and on.

Then he started the whole - "If you love me the way I love you then you won't go home with him tonight."

After that is was - "If you go home with him tonight we are over and I will never see you again."

Then - "Fine. If you aren't going to answer me then I am going to get very drunk and ride my motorcycle. Hopefully I will find enough pain to take away the pain I am feeling right now."

Eventually he actually stalked me at the bar and caused a huge scene outside. Totally embarrassing! Shaine was super cool about it, but....nightmare city. And even after Gene left he continued to send me text messages almost the entire night.  I had to shut my phone off just to get a little peace and quiet.

The next morning I had fifty tons of text messages that went from pleading to basically threatening suicide. Which would normally make me feel guilty...but remember I've been in his phone. I've seen his text messages. He has even confirmed that he had sex with another woman just last weekend - after he had been intimate with me the night before and then again the night after. So WHY should I feel guilty when he has made it Extremely clear that he wants to date other women? In fact, I asked him specifically how he felt about me dating other men and he replied that he was fine with it as long as he was still able to see me too. So....NO GUILT!

Okay...maybe a tiny bit of guilt. Not for going home with Shaine instead of Gene - but because a tiny part of me did it out of vindictive revenge. I wanted Gene to know how it felt. After he's done it to me sooooooo many times that part of me did a little jig inside knowing he was even partly as miserable as I always was.

That guilt is what kept me kissing his butt all day Sunday too. I spent the entire day with him, just laying around in his bed watching TV and listening to him be incredibly mean to me. Every other sentence out of his mouth was one hurtful statement or another. It was driving me insane - but I stuck it out. I even took him out to lunch at Subway and then out to a movie later that evening. And he spent the night at my house, both Sunday night and last night.

One day of butt kissing is enough though. I am over it - and over the situation. I don't want to stop seeing Shaine....and to be honest with every moment Gene spends blaming me for life's problems and generally putting me down is another moment closer to not wanting to be with him at all.

I guess we will see how things go from here.